3 Things Men Can Teach Us

I understand how the title might be triggering, but I genuinely mean it. There are some valuable lessons that we can learn from men, and yes, there are things that men are way better at than us women.

We were sitting in the faculty lounge at work and pondering this question:
What are things that men are absolutely better at than women?
Of course, the opportunity to bring up that the best fashion designers, chefs, makeup artists, etc., are men was ravaged by the men in the group, as some sort of factual evidence that there’s no category that exists where men can’t outperform women (eye roll x100).

I sat there silently, contemplating, and asked myself:
What really can I learn from the men around me?
And actually, I came up with three life-changing lessons that I’ve decided to adopt from now on.

1. To Indulge in Our State of Being

What I mean by that is to truly surrender to the condition of your mind, body, and soul, whatever that may be.

Take men, for example. When they catch the flu, they fully commit to being sick. They take the day off, sleep in, lean into the illness, and allow their bodies the rest they need. Some might say they exaggerate it but honestly, that’s the way we should be.

Our bodies are temples, blessings from God, and we’re obligated to care for them with the utmost respect.

Women, on the other hand, often fall into the trap of prioritizing everyone and everything else above themselves, including their health. When I get sick, and I know many other women can relate, my first instinct isn’t to rest. It’s to fight it. To get up, go to work, hit the gym, push through, as if my body isn’t screaming for stillness.
Why? Because we tell ourselves, “I’m not going to let a cold slow me down.”

But that’s not right.
We do it in the name of strength and resilience but that’s not always what’s best for us.

I love myself. I cherish my body. I thank God every single day for the ability to get out of bed, walk, drive, live autonomously and independently. So the least I can do, when my body is unwell, is tend to it. Nurture it. Let it rest.

(Don’t even get me started on how men indulge in anger while we bottle it up until it rots us from the inside.)

Take this as your reminder:
Self-care is not a luxury. It’s not an add-on. It’s a basic, non-negotiable necessity.

2. To Do One Thing at a Time

We all know that women are better at multitasking than men, but I’ve also come to the revelation that multitasking is so overrated.

Obviously, I acknowledge that sometimes we don’t have a choice. But for me, there are so many times I’ve taken on more projects and load, not out of necessity but out of fear of missing out, an excess of ambition, or simply because I can’t say no. Because I owe my workplace, or my boss, or whoever’s asking me, something.

But I look at my male colleagues. They’re really good at setting boundaries. They say no. They do one thing at a time, and they excel at it. Meanwhile, I juggle three or four projects at once, and it’s my health and sanity that takes the hit.

Men are very clear about communicating their capabilities, and they do it with confidence:

“I just want to focus on X. I don’t want to take on anything else.”

They don’t justify it. They don’t overexplain. And guess what?
It works. 99% of the time, it works out great for them.

It’s often the man who did one thing but did it for an extended period and did it big who’s recognized over the woman who juggled nine ambitious projects outside her main scope and excelled in most.

Take this lesson as a reminder. It’s okay to do less.

3. Whimsical Delusion in One’s Abilities

Most successful women suffer from imposter syndrome.
Most of us underestimate our performance and workplace worth.

We command rooms, slaughter targets, innovate, lead, and change companies from the core, and still, we’re not very sure of ourselves.

We overcompensate by working three times harder than necessary. We worry it was all by chance. We think we tricked everyone. We fear that if we had to do it again, we probably couldn’t.

Men? Oh, they do good, and they think they’ve done great.
They believe their performance was exceptional, groundbreaking, legendary even, and they say it with so much conviction that they end up convincing all of us.

It’s their whimsical delusion in their abilities, the way they really believe they can do anything, that sets them apart.
They walk the walk, even if they don’t have a clue how to back it up.

And honestly? I think that attitude, that persona, is something we women should embody.
From now on, I will walk into every room like a man.

When I shared these thoughts in the lounge, I silenced everyone.

The men and women both looked at me, stunned by the revelation, nodding their heads despite themselves.
We all walked away from our break that day with something different.

For me, it was this:
I will be more like men. :)